Funny how things work out

So I'm just looking over the few entries I've posted over the last month or two, and it's interesting to see how things are slowly evolving with this TNTP process....

Since the very beginning, I've wanted to capture my entire experience of this journey ~ my ups and downs, worries and disappointments, triumphs and celebrations... because it really is a big undertaking. In no way do I think or feel that entering the field of Education as a teacher [with absolutely no experience, mind you] will be an easy thing. I expect challenges. I expect great things, too. I also expect that there will be some days that I will wonder what the heck I've gotten myself into....

But I can't help but think about how the blogs of other writers have helped me so much already, even at this early stage. I haven't even started Summer Institute yet and still I've been encouraged so much by the musings of bloggers like Fear the Fellow and Harry Potter and the Urban School Nightmare... just reading their experiences and feelings and thoughts through their first years in particular have kept me encouraged and excited about the things that lie before me. I can only imagine some new Teaching Fellow getting their acceptance into the program next year, eagerly Googling anything even close to a blog done by someone who's already walked a little ways in the shoes they're about to fill... and I hope that my experience can help someone at some point, too.

There's a part of me that's soooo uber excited, ready to get started learning, finding out the how-to's of helping to make a change [even if only a small dent] in our educational system's woes, and there's another part of me that's kept grounded and realistic about the things that I may encounter that just might try to rain on my parade a little. This is why these other blogs have been so helpful. While I fully plan to hold onto my excitement for this whole thing, I want to learn from the wisdom that others have shared from the trenches - the real talk that you don't get from any textbook or Institute workshop.

It's a real balancing act, to say the least, but a real healthy and realistic one, I think. I think it will do me very well to hold onto it for awhile!

So glad...

So glad that things are 'officially' getting underway! Just got notification to get my physical and TB test done, as well as to attend an upcoming New Hire Orientation in a few weeks. Things are gettin' movin'!

Summer Institute's getting closer by the minute! :)

Yayayayay!!!!

Lord, you're SOOOO good to me!!!

Oh, bless God. I checked my Praxis II 0543 scores this morning and I passed!! Yay me!!

I can't tell you the number of horror stories I've heard concerning these tests... how they're too difficult to pass unless you take it umpteen times, how many people have to take it time and time again only to still not pass it... one person even told me of a friend of theirs who had to take it 11 times. 11 times??? I don't know what I'd do if I had to face these tests that many times. Probably would be pulling my hair out by test day, for real. Btw, the prep guide I used was Cliff Notes Praxis II: Education of Exceptional Students (0353, 0382, 0542, 0544) . I think this book is an exceptional preparation for taking this particular test. Check it out if you have this test coming up... it's only like $15 on Amazon.com.

I'm just so thankful. Thankful for God's grace. Thankful that these tests are behind me. Thankful that I don't have to see them eeeeeever again (I hope). Yay!

W-h-e-w... MAJOR butterflies...

Tomorrow is D-Day. Tomorrow determines what the next three to four weeks of my life will look like. Tomorrow will either speak peace and allow me to get back to my assigned reading and observations and ISG assignments, or it will speak [uuugggghhhhhhhh...] days upon days of more stringent studying, late nights and information overload times ten.

Tomorrow is Praxis II result day for the Special Ed test.

The. Test. The one that counts more than the previous one I took, and the one that will either solidify my placement in the upcoming summer program or place it precariously on a perch of maybe yes... maybe no...
Although our initial acceptance into the program is all done, the full acceptance is contingent upon us passing BOTH Praxis II exams before Summer Institute begins in June. And the April test date will be the last ditch effort toward that end for those of us who do not pass the March test.

W-h-e-w. MAJOR butterflies.

But... I'm determined to center and remind myself that I'm a woman of faith. I read everything I could get my hands on. I studied my butt off. I stayed up late nights and got up early only to begin that dern study cycle alllllll over again, day after day. And then when all that was said and done, I prayed and trusted God for the rest. So, I'm reminding myself that praying about something now and then worrying about it later don't go together... it has to be one or the other, for real. I'm reminded of a message that a preacher brought years ago that really blessed me ~ If you're gonna pray, don't worry. If you're gonna worry, don't pray. I choose the former.

Whatever tomorrow holds, it's all good. I'll either be celebrating [big time] or getting my study on for a second round of Praxis II 0543. 

We'll see! ;)

Good Stuff...

I've come up with a pacing schedule to keep myself on track with my required ISG reading till Institute starts in June. I figure if I read about three chapters per week, I'll end up finishing a week early, and that'll give me time to review and prepare before the craziness that is Summer Institute begins....

I've got to say, this book is good stuff. I'm finding this information to be soooo interesting! Reading up on the different categories of disabilities and their individual descriptions is just fascinating. Fascinating! Who knew? I had no idea that I had an interest in this stuff until a few months ago... but man, am I glad I came across this opportunity! I find myself wanting to take in all I can possibly learn about autism, learning disabilities, etc. If the first few chapters of this [h-u-g-e] book are any indication, reading the remaining 600+ some pages should go well.

On another note, I came across some great blogs this weekend that have been awesome in giving me a first-hand account of what teaching might be like right out of the gate as a teaching fellow. If you're a beginning teacher like me and you're looking for all the help and advice from seasoned educators you can get [also like me, lol], then take a moment to check out some of these. I love the honesty that they show in their postings, 'cause that's exactly what I'm looking for. I don't want someone who will paint a picture of roses and butterflies concerning this huge undertaking we're about to take on - I want the truth, and plenty of it. These blogs do that, and I love it. I'll post links to some of the others I come across moving forward, too.

Every little bit of wisdom (and truth) counts! ;)

Y-E-S-S-S-S-S-S!!!!

DUDE!! I passed the Praxis II 0511 on the first try!!! Y-E-S !!!! Omg, that was one of the scariest tests I've taken in a really long time! Nothing but the favor and grace of God... and Lord, I'm sooooo thankful!!!

I've heard horror stories about this test, and about the Praxis in general, of so many people having to take it multiple times in order to get a passing score... and I think that was part of what had me a little nervous about the test, too. I bought the Cliff Notes Praxis II Fundamental Subjects Content Knowledge Study Guide from Amazon.com for about $15, and read the book from cover to cover. I took all 8 of the practice tests they gave (2 for each subject), then examined the questions I got wrong to see which concepts I needed to brush up on...then took the tests again... and again... and, well, you get it.

I felt really prepared after having read the book, but when I sat down on test day to actually take the exam, the questions seemed completely different from what was in the book and on the practice tests... honestly, I prayed my way through that test, no joke. Now, I know the power of prayer. It works. It's real. God hears and He responds to the requests of his people. But I also feel like I have some responsibility in this, too. I felt like I had to make sure I did my part by studying and reading and practicing, preparing and going over stuff I don't like like fractions, proportions, etc, etc., etc... I so thank God for giving me the understanding of the things I studied, for helping me to remember names and dates and concepts and other things that I'd long since forgotten (I've been out of high school for a looooooooong time, lol). I ended up getting a 182 out of a possible 200... YES!!  God is so faithful. So very faithful!!!

I find out next Tuesday how I did on the Praxis II 0543 - the one especially geared to teaching Special Ed. I'll just keep myself busy working on the Independent Study Guide assignments and reading the (600 page plus) text, and Tuesday will be here before you know it.

What an amazing day!!!

YAYAYAY!!!

Sooooo psyched!!!! Got my Special Ed Guidebook and Addendum via email today, as well as my Independent Study Guide. YAYAYAY!!! Oh, man... I'm so psyched about actually being able to get started with learning info specific to OUR program... cool beans!! The Special Ed guidebook is all of 601 pages (whew) with an addendum that adds another 32 or so. So glad I can get started and take full advantage of the time between now and when Summer Institute actually starts. yay!

At Snail's Pace...

ooooomg, still waiting to receive whatever study materials we're supposed to get. March is pretty much done. April will be here in less than a week, which means we've lost valuable reading and studying time to help prepare for Summer Institute. There was a whole slew of stuff we were supposed to get by now, but I think they're still working on sending out acceptance notices to the last bit of applicants for this year, so it seems things might be a little behind. Oh well. I'll suck it up and get back to my reading online. I found quite a few (great) books on Special Ed at the University's library, and I've been busying myself with learning as much as I can from those. In particular, books like The Fundamentals of Special Education: A Practical Guide for Every Teacher (Algozzine), Teaching in a Special Education Classroom (Pierangelo), The Teacher's Ultimate Planning Guide (Burke) and The First Days of School (Wong) have been especially helpful. Wong's book is excellent for things to implement and keep in mind at the very beginning of the school year, so things go alot more smoothly. This is one that I definitely plan to purchase... it's got so much great stuff for new teachers to be mindful of and implement so that we can alleviate behavior problems right from the beginning. If you get a chance to check it out, this one is definitely a good read. So much great information that I never really thought of... and being a brand-new teacher this coming fall, I'll take all the help I can get! :-)  I also have What Every Principal Needs to Know about Special Education (McLaughlin) and Wally's Stories, but I haven't begun to read these just yet. So far, I'm reading the first four simultaneously, along with the online copy of Teaching for Student Achievement that I found on Google. For now I guess, I’ll keep reading these and other things I can get my hands on about Special Ed, and continue to schedule classroom observations as much as I can before the end of the school year comes. Come on, TNTP!!!

Watching the Pros...

I did my first classroom observation yesterday.

I haven’t received anything/paperwork/directions yet from the program’s admin, so I went by what I saw on the Independent Study Guide (ISG) that someone posted online from the same program in a different state. It gave very basic guidelines of what to look for during the observation, and what to be aware of as well. I have to say, I was impressed with the teaching.

There were 2 teachers in the room – 1 general ed and 1 EC – but they flowed so well with each other that you really couldn’t tell which was which. They did a lesson for 6^th graders on how emotion and situation affects plot, and dissected a book they were all reading by having the students suggest evidence of certain emotions in the text and then support those claims with evidence in the tests. Next, they plotted them on a graph, reinforcing math concepts of point of origin, neutral line and how the things are positive on the upper side of the neutral line, and negative on the lower side. It was really interesting to watch how they put this lesson together with the kids. They used the (?) Frayer model with I do, You do, We do, You do independently, and I was finally able to see a really good example of a full lesson, from what I know so far – introduction of the topic and essential question for the day (used later to assess learning), directed instruction (I do), working cooperatively with partners (you do) and finally, having the kids find, support and plot a point of emotion in the book on their own (you do independently). It was kind of cool to watch all of this come together, and the kids enjoyed it too… almost every one of them were engaged, with the exception of maybe a child or two sitting way in the back or on the outer edges on the sides of the room.

The coteaching was exceptional. These ladies literally flowed with each other, and worked so well together. One would start part of the lesson (ie. The I do), then the other would – without interruption – smoothly begin the second part (we do), and they switched back and forth as needed throughout the lesson. I have to say, I was impressed with this part. I also have to say, though, that I’m a little concerned with this part when it relates to me and where I’ll be placed this coming school year. We don’t know what kind of classroom we’ll be in just yet – coteaching, pull-out (resource room) or self-contained.  I’m reeeeeally hoping for self-contained, so I don’t end up with a lot of drama in the classroom unnecessarily. One of the teachers was kind enough to talk to me honestly about the truth that some teachers encounter often… territorial general ed teachers who don’t want anyone else in their room, feel they don’t need you, and would really just rather you go away. While I understand someone wanting their own space to work with the kids their way, I also know that if you have a class almost halfway filled with exceptional learners, you need a Special Ed teacher in that room – better spoken, the exceptional learners need someone in the room who is simultaneously sensitive to their issues while believing in them and having patience in them enough to push them and hold them to the same standards as children without those issues. It’s an awkward situation from the outset, I know, but if schools (as they are here) are moving more and more toward having less self-contained rooms and more co-teaching, it’s a necessary evil that we all have to work to find a way to work with. I’m soooo praying for my own room my first year.

One thing I learned yesterday was that, even though almost half of the children in that classroom were exceptional learners (I couldn’t tell anything at all when watching them participate and engage in the lesson), all of the kids in that room were behind and needed additional planning and differentiation – not one of them was reading on a 6^th grade level. That is just INCREDIBLE to me… but that’s a topic for another post. I wonder if I’ll ever understand how children can be passed from grade to grade to grade when they can’t READ and comprehend text. Omg. As a teacher, I know I’ve got a lot to learn concerning the differences between what is taught in the classroom and what administration/district/state/national policy makers determine as important. As a parent, it feels almost like a betrayal of sorts… I’m trying to understand how things have changed sooo much since we were in school that children can be passed to higher, more difficult and challenging grades while they are lacking the basic reading skills to succeed in those new places… smh. As I said before… definitely for another post.

So… I’ll get back to the great parts of my observation yesterday, and stop boring you with all my ranting and raving. I’d only been in the class maybe ten minutes or so, when the teacher greeted the kids for the morning. I guess the response was less than enthusiastic, so she greeted them again. Same response. So,she said something like, ‘I guess we need to do the pledge then, huh?’ And this really got reaction from the kids. I’m sitting there waiting for someone to begin a memorized thingie (or maybe redo the Pledge of Allegiance) while the kids sit in their seats…? One boy gets up, and stands on top of his chair. He stands on TOP of his chair. I’m looking around like… somebody has GOT to see this child doing this… why isn’t anybody saying anything to him? So he stays up there. And then… they ALL climb on top of their chairs and stand up there. Now the whole class is super-tall and standing nice and straight and tall on top of their chairs… Then the first boy belts out “I am”, and the class follows, loud, strong, excited, “I am”… him: “Somebody”…. They follow.  “I can do anything I put my mind to”. He continues to call out parts of the pledge, loud confident and strong, and the class follows him like a call and response kind of thing. By the time they were done, they’d announced their faith in themselves, their teachers’ faith in them, the school’s faith in them and their commitment to work hard to learn whatever was necessary to achieve the things they wanted. WOW. That was amazing. It reminded me so much of a scene from the movie, Dead Poet’s Society (the standing on the desks part, and why you do it)… man…. I might just steal that one for my own class!!!!

Waiting, waiting...

My acceptance letter says that I should receive some materials in mid-March so that I can start adequately preparing for Summer Institute. I've read from other TNTP fellow blog posts that Teaching for Student Achievement is a really huge book, and don't want to wait too long before I'm starting things... I found several copies of the book online a few weeks ago, and that's what I've been using to study for now (so I'll have a head start and won't drive myself crazy trying to read 600+ pages before June!!!), but I'd sure feel alot better if I could know for sure that the copy I've been using (copyright 2004) is the right one. At any rate, I figure that the core information is pretty much constant, so I'm gonna keep reading what I have and just wait for the program's administration to send out the book link. I'm funny like that... I don't like to wait till the last minute to get ready for stuff, especially things that I need to read and take time to absorb and get the full effect of... the contents of this book are going to provide a crucial foundation for what we're about to take on this school year, from what I understand, and I want to be prepared as much as possible.

I can't wait for Summer Institute to start. I'm so looking forward to meeting all the people that will be in our cohort this year, and to officially getting started with the (formal) learning process. I'm especially psyched that I can call ETS next Friday and get my Praxis II scores over the phone... dude... that rocks!!! Waiting so long for week after week is just freakin' torture. Being able to call and get the score helps that sooo much. We had to take the paper test... computer wasn't an option, hence the longer wait for results. But next Friday is so very close and I'm crossing days off the calendar till I get there! The Special Ed test (0543) wasn't half as bad as I expected it to be... and the book I used to help prepare for it was just excellent. The same kind of questions that were in the book were what was on the test, which is awesome. I've heard so many people say that their preparation/study books gave questions that were nowhere like what was on the actual test, and I'm so glad that wasn't my experience with this one. Now, the Fundamental Subjects Core Knowledge test (0511) was pure freakin' nightmare material. Seriously. The study book I used for that one (ironically, written by the same authors who produced the excellent Special Ed study guide) was a waste of $15. I did all that reading and studying, and the test was soooo NOT  like what was in that book. The book helps you study things you'd expect ... math formulas, science fundamentals, major events in history, etc.... but the test wasn't anything like that. It asked questions that I felt seemed way out in left field sometimes, like what two people had a conversation about whether states should maintain slavery within their separate boundaries (actual conversation provided for you, btw)... now, I understand the concept of asking a question like this to find out if you have a sense of the time period and all... that makes perfect sense to me. But to be able to match people who were US Senators at that time along with the timeframe... omg. I have NO idea who the senators were during that time, and although a simple Google search could answer that question for me after the fact, how in the world can I be expected to remember which US senators served during which particular periods in history?? What?? You've got to be kidding me. Ask me about the Industrial Revolution or the wars we've participated in or social programs that came to be in response to the Great Depression... you know... general HISTORY stuff like that... and I can answer it. But some of the questions on this test seemed so incredibly out of left field to me that I wouldn't honestly know where to start to study for it again, if I had to. I'm praying (seriously) that I've passed this particular test and don't e-v-e-r have to see that stuff again anytime soon in a test format. Whew. Just thinking about it makes me shudder. Anywho. Another week and a half or so, and I'll know my fate, and whether or not I have to sign up to take the test on 4/30 again.

In the meantime, I'm inhaling this book and all the principles, knowledge and strategies that are presented in it. It really does have great information. And reading this stuff makes you think... if you have to actually tell teachers to have a goal of getting all their students on or above grade level before they leave you... what in the world was going on in education before this reform movement started?? That's so common sense to me - especially as an educator - and it's such a scary thought to think about all the teachers who either never really gave this much thought or who just passed their students grade after grade, whether or not they were truly on grade level and were really 'ready' for the next level of learning. I'm so ready to learn this stuff. Teach me, TNTP. Let's go.

...And we have Lift off !!!

I’m so excited!!  I started reading the program’s guidebook for Summer Institute, and I’m learning so much already. Teaching for Student Achievement has so much great information in it, and the thing I love most is that it doesn’t just talk about what we’re supposed to be doing to become effective teachers, it also gives you the how to. Our cohort hasn’t gotten together officially as a team or anything yet, but I imagine that that should be coming real soon. We’re scheduled to begin Institute in mid to late June, so I’m trying to do all that I can to gear up and prepare. We won’t be making any money during that time, so I’m looking for a temporary job for now to earn some money and save up for those six weeks.  Now all I have to do is make sure I pass that dang PRAXIS II. I just took it a week or so ago, and read everything I could to help me prepare for it. I stayed up late nights for weeks studying and taking practice tests and making note cards to help me understand and remember facts and theories… man, I was seriously tired by the time that test date came. After that, I prayed and now I’m resting in my trust in God to get me through. I won’t know the results until the beginning of April, so in the meantime, I’m keeping myself busy looking for temporary work and reading up on my subject and state/district standards. Gotta do my due diligence!  J

All things really do work together for the good...

So… I’ve decided to document my entire experience with this journey into lateral-entry teaching… and I can finally (f-i-n-a-l-l-y) say that I’m officially on my way. After not getting accepted into Teach for America, I’d begun to think that maybe this path wasn’t for me and didn’t quite know what to do with all this excitement growing in me to help make our educational system better… I was one of those In the application cohort that had to wait a full month and a half just to hear yea or nay from Teach for America (TFA), and let me tell you, waiting for that looooooong amount of time was pure torture. I’ve never checked my email so much before in my life, hoping and praying that maybe, just maybe, there would be an acceptance email in there from them. When the day finally came and I received my rejection letter, I just felt heartbroken. Words really don’t express how terrible I felt when reading that letter… I’d read everything I could get my hands on about TFA, found blogs from corps members and read every single one of them page by page for any inkling of what Summer Institute and the resulting workload would be like, and Googled any and everything else I could find to get an inside view of what I might be in for during the next two years of my life. I’d literally lived and breathed TFA stuff for a month and a half, waiting and not hearing anything, and now, all of that was suddenly over. But I did manage to do one thing, in spite of my initial feelings of disappointment in not being selected – I gave them permission to forward my information to like programs around the country, just in case they felt that my interest and qualifications fit their program. And that, as they say, was all she wrote.

I began receiving tons (and I do mean tons) of offers for programs literally all over the country, with objectives very similar to TFA. Who knew? I’d just learned of TFA and what they were about a few weeks before deciding to apply, and had no idea that an entire movement to change our educational system was underfoot, with hundreds of similar programs covering just about every major city in the country. I received offers to apply to programs in New Orleans, Memphis, Philadelphia, New York, Baltimore, DC, and so many other places. Not knowing what else to do with all this newfound excitement and determination to help contribute something toward closing the achievement gap, I applied. And waited. Not even two weeks later, I received notice of an interview date. Not two weeks after that, I received my acceptance email into The New Teacher Project (TNTP), and I realize now that I am right where I was always meant to be. I was ready – really ready – to pick up and relocate wherever TFA might have decided to send me… but who knew that I’d end up being accepted in the lateral entry teaching program found right here in my own town? I get to learn and challenge myself and help kids get a better education, and I don’t even have to pick up and leave everything that’s familiar to do so. And I never would have even known that TNTP existed had it not been for TFA’s rejection and subsequent referral to this program. What a blessing!!

New Challenges Ahead...

I can't believe these last few years have gone by so quickly.... seems like just yesterday I decided to go back to school and (finally) finish my degree. And yet, somehow all those semesters and summer sessions just seemed to fly by and before I knew it, it was time to order my cap and gown and march across that stage.. Wow.

Now that it's all done and grad school is right around the corner, I'm so excited about the new possibilities, the new opportunities and the new challenges that await. It's been such a blessing to be able to go back to school as a full-time student, while simultaneously taking care of my husband and children, and holding down other responsibilities as well... most people don't get that option when they return to school later in life. I can remember how difficult it was to take a class here and there after getting off of work at a full-time job, trying to find time to read and study and write papers and still manage to take care of home... I so admire students who are still doing this while simultaneously finishing up their degree. Who knew that the slew of layoffs that the economic crisis of 2008-2009 brought would also bring me a blessing in disguise ~ the chance to use this time to focus solely in finishing up my Bachelors... on getting that piece of paper that I've been wanting to achieve for so long. Sometimes blessings are wrapped up neatly inside what seems to be a bad thing or happening in our lives, and it just takes a little time for its presence to become known. I'm so thankful now for those layoffs, because they allowed me time to accomplish a major goal in my life...

So, now.. what lies ahead? I'm not so sure of that, but I'm definitely excited about it. Returning to full-time work is a no-brainer. The economy will pick up, things will get back to (a new) normal, and life continues to move on as it always does. I've got interviews on the calendar and I'm ready to get back to earning my own money again. I loved being a student, but I'd forgotten what it felt like to be so broke all the time!! :) Grad school's definitely on the agenda, taking classes part-time after working hours. It may take me a little longer to finish up my Masters, but I have no doubt that I'll get it done within the next few years. Who knows? I may even go for a second Masters once I'm done! Can't see myself putting in the years required for a Ph.D at this point, and honestly, I don't desire it. I've been blessed to finish up this far, and once the next few years are done, I'll be more than satisfied... and grateful.

For all of you who have already or are graduating in the coming months, I wish you all the best in all that you do. It certainly is an exciting time that lies ahead of us!